Looking back at my year with BJ

I can hardly believe that BJ is one! It has been a busy few weeks as I prepared for a little over 25 people to come over to celebrate on is birthday and then the following weekend we celebrated again with my mom, dad, and the rest of the family who could not make it to birthday party number one.

So, I thought I would cover what BJ has been up to lately:

1. Last night, BJ took two independent steps!
2. Over the weekend, he climbed three steps to the upstair's bedrooms before caught and pulled off.
3. Although is gag reflex is still strong (digestive issues of the past) he has been able to eat mushy french fries and small pieces of toast. Loved his birthday cake too. He put his full face into it!
4. He crawls like a demon.
5. He can pull himself up using his sister as his climbing pole and pull her down!
6. He will throw himself into the beanbag chair (this is partly to do with Andy tossing him into the beanbag chair as "superBJ")
7. He is working on saying more than just Mama and Dada, he almost has "no no" "ok" and "yum" down.
8. He does full bodied belly laughs when you tickle him.
9. He has eight teeth and will visit the dentist for the first time December 30th (MM visited the dentist last week and spent days showing off her special shiny teeth!)
10. He sleeps through the night as long as he sleeps with me. All attempts to get him to sleep in his bed result in me getting no sleep. Will try again over holiday break, but not holding breath.
11. He can throw a toy with amazing accuracy. My mom was amazed at how hard and how well aimed he is. So maybe it will not be football, it will be baseball.
12. He loves to sit on mommy's lap as long as it is not the rocking chair because he knows that he is going to fall asleep if I am there.

I am not sure what life would be like without my big boy. I am sure things would be different, but more than that, it has forced me to prioriterize differently. After falling down the stairs with him, I thought I would never feel better, but now I am getting my energy back. I am able to move more quickly than I have in nearly two years and I am able to get more accomplished in a shorter time period than before. If I do not have the children, I am able to clean the house, go shopping, do laundry and loads of other things in the same amount of time it took for me to just clean the house. I still do not know how the supermoms do it; I can either get work done or play with the kids, but not both. I want to be all things to my children, but do not know how to get the house in order and play with them. Maybe the trick is that the supermoms do not have small children; they only become supermoms after the children are all over three!

Knowing that BJ will be my last child has also made me focus more on the little details that seem a blur with MM. I am taking the time to snuggle and just sit with him on my lap. I try to make sure I pay attention to him for a while when I get home because I know that I only have an hour and a half before he falls asleep. Afterwards, I sit with MM, eat popcorn and watch the "Good Night Show" on Sprout until after the "Rubbadubbers." Every once in a while I am able to get her down and then go back downstairs to clean up, but usually I just stay in bed with them and enjoy the down time. That explains the messy house!

I am thankful for family, cleaning supplies and Benedryl

As many of you did, I decided that the Thanksgiving break would be a good time to clean house. I had off from school from the Wednesday through Sunday. Sadly, it was not enough time. Family obligations pulled me in several different directions.

I had a funeral to attend on Wednesday, which was more important than cleaning. My Uncle Bob was a WWII vet. His funeral was both amazing and sad. He had a 21 gun salute, a bugle play taps, a poem and a flag folding ceremony. It made me realize that there are so few WWII vets left that we need to honor the ones we have left.

Thursday was Turkey Day. I got up early with the children and worked on organizing the kitchen as I made my grandmother's version of sweet potato casserole (it is really a dessert). My husband got the children bathed for me while I worked on picking out clothes to wear, putting away laundry, and just cleaned up around the house. But then the hives came. MM broke out in hives for no reason we could fathom. We thought it was the soap since Andy used an older bottle of baby shampoo, but now we are not so sure. After getting her dressed, I went to the store to get a few things including cream to put on the hives. Then we went to my sister-in-law's house for dinner. The hives came back with such force, we left Evelyn's and went to Kmart (thank God it was still open) and got Benedryl. That took care of it for a while, but as soon as the Benedryl wore off, the hives returned. The rest of the break was spent putting cream on hives and dosing her with Benedryl. We still have not figured it out.

On Friday I worked on organizing closets, sorting through clothes, making piles of clothing to be donated, cleaning my room, organizing the linen closet, doing laundry... Needless to say I had more than a day's worth of cleaning to do. Although I continued off and on over Saturday and Sunday, I still have to vacuum and wash windows. I did finally find my drapes in the back of my closet so I can put drapes up in my living room and get rid of those horrible, broken, wooden blinds that the previous owner had. I have people coming over to celebrate my son's first birthday this coming weekend and I really need to get my house ship-shape; however, my husband is going to the mountains to go deer hunting this Friday so I will not have any more help after Thursday!

On Saturday, I had a surprise wedding to go to. One of my former students got married. She was beautiful, the groom was handsome and the wedding was simple but elegant. I cried, and took multiple pictures. She had only told me about the wedding a week before hand because they realized that their list of attendees had gotten up to 350, but they could not afford such a huge expense, so this wedding was their alternative to eloping. I, however, could not stay for the reception because I had previously made arrangements to visit a friend of mine whose mom is quiet frail.

Finally, Sunday. My mom had hand surgery last month on her right hand. She had carpal tunnel release and a joint replaced in her right thumb. Needless to say, she is not working up to speed. Because this holiday season is finding me low in cash, I have turned to giving services for gifts. Since my mom is not able to clean house very well, I went to her house to clean. I spent about five hours doing minutia cleaning, the kind that would require two hands. I made beds, dusted floorboards, washed windows (not all, some), organized a bookcase to fit more books, re-arranged furniture, cleaned the refrigerator, cleaned toilets, wiped down counter-tops, scrubbed floors, vacuumed the stairs, vacuumed, and decorated. I ran out of steam before I got upstairs, so I have to go back in two weeks to finish cleaning upstairs, but thankfully there is only two bedrooms and a bath there.

So, my house is mostly cleaned and my mom's house is mostly cleaned. MM hives are being controlled by Benedryl until we can figure out what is causing them. So, overall, I am thankful for family, cleaning supplies and Benedryl.

My version of "The Necklace"

So there is a short story about a vain woman who wants to have more and be adored but is stuck married to a middle management person. She convinces him to go to a ball and borrows a wealthy friends diamond necklace for the event. She is dazzling and has a wonderful time; however, she realizes that she has lost the diamond necklace! Her husband finds an exact match, but it will require much sacrifice to pay for it. The woman must clean houses and take in laundry, while her husband works two jobs. Finally, after many, many years, the necklace is paid off. The vain woman is but  shadow of her former, beautiful self. She sees the wealthy "friend" whose necklace was borrowed in the park one day. The vain woman approaches her and the wealthy woman does not remember her. The vain woman tells her story and ends with, but now I am glad to say that it is finally paid for. The wealthy woman looks at the once beautiful, but shallow friend and says, "Oh dear, the necklace was but paste!" In other words, it was fake!

I feel as if I am in the middle of this story, but I can not claim to be beautiful, but I am sure I have been a snob. I am doing "penance" (not Catholic though) for not being caring enough or unselfish enough in my youth. I wasted money that I did not have and I did not appreciate what I had. I shopped to fill in a need, but did not know what that need was. I am now paying the piper, so to speak. I am stuck working as many hours as I can squeeze into the day and it is still not enough. I want to be able to do and provide better for my family but it is impossible to squeeze anymore time into the day. I wish I had some of that stupid money that I wasted over the years. I wish I could go back in time and smack some sense into the younger me! Until then, I am going to have to weather the economic storm that placed me in this stinky spot and hope that next school year will be better.

Sorry to be a downer this time!

Oh, BJ has eight teeth and can stand by himself (at least for 30 seconds or so)!

The glue that holds the family together

My grandmom Van Den Heuvel died 17 years ago; she was the glue that held the extended family together. In the years since her passing, my family has lost some of the best traditions, one of which was always getting together for Thanksgiving.

To share the "burden" of the meal, my aunt and my mom would trade off years. Who ever had the meal would take care of the main parts plus a few side dishes and the guest family would bring a few favorite side dishes with them. There would be aunts, uncles, cousins, in-laws, grandparents, and friends squeezed into one house. One year we had 24 people for dinner. We could never sit all at one time, so the men sat first and the children sat at the children's table. Once that part was complete, the men would waddle over to the living room to watch the game and the kids would race each other up and down the stairs, walk outside, and/or sit at the women's table. It was at the second seating that the best news/ gossip could be heard. I always enjoyed sitting there and listening to my older cousins, mom, aunt, grandmom and other relatives talk about life. It was a wonderful experience.

This year will be the first year that the family is not getting together. Well, I should say most of the family. My parents are staying in Florida because my youngest sister and her family are traveling to them for Thanksgiving and Disney World. My sister who lives in Virginia is staying there to work on her house that she recently put on the market. My oldest sister is doing something with her husband at the American Legion. I had offered to make the Meal for the sister who lives nearby, but now am left with only my immediate family (not that they are not important, but I make dinner for them every night). My aunt and uncle are doing something separate from their children and their children are going to different homes for their Thanksgiving meal. What used to be a wonderful, crazy, loud Thanksgiving meal that lasted for nearly three hours is now a thing of the past.

Grandmom would have been so sad.

BJ updates

It has been a while since I have shared anything about my son. He is 11 months old now and crawling up a storm! I was really worried about BJ not crawling since he seemed to want to bypass the whole process and move quickly to standing and walking. His earlier digestive issues seemed to impact the desire to be on his tummy, but now that he realizes that he does not have to have his head down while crawling, he is like Speedy Gonzalez!

Other than the crawling his personality is really beginning to shape. He loves to laugh, especially at his sister. I think that MM is his number one toy! The other day she entertained him for about 20 minutes pretending to "spit" out a soft block. BJ was into full bodied laughs at the end of it. I can not tell you how relieved I am about this. The first five months of my life with him was not the most magical and I really worried there would be other issues developing. Who doesn't worry about autism or some other issue when there are so many complications with the pregnancy and then the first five months being so rough. Not that it compares in anyway to parents who have children with severe issues, but since my only comparison was with my sister's children and my first born, BJ was a challenge. To add to that, I have been under so much stress with work that I know that my stress can be felt by my children. I did not want to do anything to create an issue where there might not have been one otherwise.

I also think that BJ is going to be clever like his sister. He saw the vacuum cleaner cord the other day and crawled with it over to the outlet (covered of course) and tried to plug it in. Now, I do not vacuum in front of him, but he made the connection that its plug got put into the wall at that point. You know I went out and got more outlet covers that day! He seems to sit back, analyze, plan his attack and then makes his move. He has also gotten his sister down a few times (revenge!) and I have had to rescue her.

Oh, the teeth are coming in with a vengeance and his is getting huge. The teeth all decided to arrive at the same time. For awhile he only had two teeth, then a third one appeared, but all on the bottom. Well, the upper teeth are making an appearance, but it is the eye teeth! So just in time for Halloween, he had fangs! I am going to guess that by his first birthday he will have another six making an appearance if the little gum buds are any indication. He is now 25 pounds and 28 inches tall. For a little perspective, MM is 3 years old, 31 pounds and 36 inches tall. BJ better be a professional football player!

I know that there will be many more interesting firsts with him, I just hope that I appreciate them as much as I did with his sister. I do not want to treat him like the second born, but his own unique self.

Doing things for yourself

 I am feeling selfish right now. Maybe selfish is not the right word. I am taking time to do things for myself that I have not had time to do for a while. Having children and a husband and... well you know, things just get in the way of taking time for oneself.

Last weekend my husband took the children to the mountains. His family have a cabin there and he feels better about life when he can get away from responsibilities for a while. The only thing was that he had to take the children because I had a conference I need to attend. His buddy Tom went too. Tom brought his grandsons along so that MM had children to play with. My mother-in-law went so she helped to take care of BJ. So I guess he did have down time away from responsibilities.

I took the time to sleep in when I could and I went to the movies. I saw Hereafter. I was good. I liked the chance to watch something that Andy would not watch and that will most likely be nominated for an Oscar. It really makes you think about life, death, and making sure that you live life. I had saved spare change to give me enough money to go. I guess that was me being selfish because I should have spent it on the family, but I did not. I did get a free bag of popcorn, so going to the movies was just the cost of the movie. Anyway, I slept in the next day and did not get much cleaning done in the house. Andy was a little irritated with me because I think he was expecting to come home to a clean house I did not do it.

I do have a wish though. I would love to be able to go to England. I miss it, I miss my friends, and I miss the feeling of non-stress that I have while there. Sitting in a cafe having tea or going to a pub to talk with friends is so wonderful. Here there is so many things that I need to do, but there I can see my priorities so much more clearly. Before reconnecting with my husband, I had begun the process to find employment in Scotland. I was at the second stage of the process when I went on my second first date with Andy and changed my mind. I would not change my decision, but sometimes I wish that I could see what life would have been like if I gone that direction, you know, like the movie Sliding Doors?

I went to school to grade papers this morning. Before I did anything I read a chapter in a book someone recommended The Perks of Being a Wallflower. So that means that again I was being a little selfish and irresponsible. Andy is giving me time to work on school work, but the quiet beckoned and I felt the need to read. I have not had the chance to read for a while. I will say that I used to read a book a week, but now do not have the time. Children and sleep absorb too much time.

I also put on soundtrack to Forrest Gump. I know, very retro, but it immediately reminded me of when I was in my twenties and had so few responsibilities and stress; yet I felt the pressures of the world upon my shoulders. Ha, that was nothing!

 I think I would love to have a few more days of blissful irresponsibility. Is once a week too much?

Wow! It has been a while!

I can not believe I have been away from the blog for so long! I am sorry. I have been insanely busy. The school year was so crazy at the beginning that I lost 12 pounds! Now for those who know me, other than giving birth, that is the only time I have been able to so easily lose weight.

I have so many things to say that I am tempted to say them all in one blog, but it would mean that this one would be a two pager, so I will try to do it in several. I am also going to try to be better and schedule the blog writing time.

So let me address the schedule change and how it has been working. When I last talked about it, I said that I was working during the day, taking care of the children in the evening and taking the children with me to work so that my husband could pick them up in the parking lot of my school after his 3rd shift job ended. Well, that is still the schedule, sort of.

MM is a very inquisitive child. She enjoys challenging herself and exploring new places as well as her abilities. You know the cartoon in which the small child stacks loads of books, furniture, and toys into an teetering tower so that she can reach the cookie jar? Well, that is MM. As much as my husband wanted to stay awake, after working all night at a physically demanding job, he was finding himself falling asleep about mid-morning. He even tried not sitting down, but eventually he needed to, and well, MM was waiting.

So, before we came up with a solution, MM did the following:

1. climbed up on a chair, then the counter-top and got into an upper cabinet in the kitchen to get the plastic salt mill so that she could put it in the toaster. My husband woke up to the smell of smoke. Needed to replace toaster and salt mill; thankfully not house, child or husband.
2. dumped an entire container of liquid soap in the sink and "finger painted" the floor, the walls and her hair. (took a 10 minute shower to get all the soap out of her hair and off body).
3. walked out of house (!) to play in the rain. She did have her boots on.
4. went poo-poo in potty but does not have wiping skills quite mastered so rubbed butt on white carpet in her bedroom until she felt clean.
5. used window markers to decorate the wood-work, the walls, the fabric on dining room chairs, the tile in foyer, the carpet in living room, her shoes and finally her brother's toes (this woke Andy up).
6. dumped an entire container of liquid soap in the other bathroom after climbing onto stool. She "finger painted" the mirror, the walls, the floor and the carpet in playroom. (another 10 minute shower)
7. used crayons to color in whole deck of playing cards.
8. revenge peed in her bedroom
9. dumped all of her toys out of their containers in the play room, thus creating a crawling hazard for BJ
10. jumped from coffee table to couch, to sitting chairs, to coffee table, to couch...

So, we have scraped together every last cent we have so that we could hire my husband's adult niece for a few hours each day. Kim comes over from 1 pm until I get home so that Andy can sleep from 1 pm to 8 pm and MM never gets the chance to be too creative.

My wet surprise

The other night my three year old climbed into bed with me. She snuggled up to me and fell back to sleep. About 45 minutes later, I got a wet surprise: yup, she peed in bed!

my new schedule

As some of you will remember, my husband lost his job a week after I gave birth to BJ. Thankfully, he was able to get a new job the week that unemployment ran out. For all those people who are upset with people on unemployment, let me say that it helped us not lose our new home and it took Andy ALL that time to find a new job because area employers are just not hiring. Anywho, it is a third shift job which changes a few things for us...

At the end of the school year last year, Andy was watching MM and BJ. This year that has not changed, but he will have both full time. Last year I was able to get MM into some daycare to give Andy a break, but this year we just can not do it. MM's daycare has a great preschool program but we do not qualify for it. The other program that I wanted to get her into is too expensive for us right now. We make too much money to get a break in tuition but do not make enough money to be able to afford the $165 a week it would cost to have MM there- and they do not have part time. I am sad that MM will not have pre-school this year. I am going to make up little lessons for Andy to do with her so that she does not lose all of her skills.  I am aware that this means that I will be doing the lessons with her most of the time, but this way I know that he will at least have something to turn to when the weather is not so great.

This change of schedule for Andy means that he will be working all night and then watching the children all day. He leaves at 9:45 pm to get to work by 10:30 pm and then he meets me in the school parking lot at 7:15 am to take the children home. I will then finish with school at 3:30 pm and race home to be there for when the children get up from their afternoon nap because Andy will be going down for his big sleep at that time.

This has been difficult. I have to do lesson planning and grading after the children go to bed which puts me to bed around 11:00, but I have to get up at 6 am so that I can get ready plus get the children ready and out the door by 7 am. BJ continues to have some stomach issues which means that I have had to deal with a child who is throwing up still while still trying to get ready. So far I have had to change him three different times and change my outfit twice before getting out the door (and we have only done this for a week!). I also have to keep the children quiet while Andy is sleeping, make dinner, get them ready for bed and try to prepare for the next day. Andy gets up for dinner/ breakfast around the time that I am putting the children to bed and leaves for work about an hour after I have been successful. Talk about two ships passing in the night! To add to the fun, Andy still needs to pick his brother up from dialysis on Friday nights which means that on Fridays, when he is not working, he needs to adjust his sleep schedule to accommodate that change.

I basically only really see Andy on Saturday and part of Sunday. We are like two single parents who are only married on the weekend. Again, it is difficult, but I am happy that we are able to keep our home and that this difficulty will only last for a while. In two years MM will be in kindergarten and Andy's truck and mortgage will be paid off. Of course I will have to resume paying my student loans...

not multi-tasking very well

I have always prided myself on my ability to juggle multiple things at one time. My mom has always said that I burn both ends of a candle and then attempt to burn the middle too. Well, I like to stay busy, but lately I have had trouble completing my mile long lists. I "write" them in my head, and then usually attack them. But, since I got back from Florida, I have lost my energy. I just want to play with the kids.

Ok, so I cleaned up the playroom and had Andy help me re-arrange the furniture in our bedroom. Oh, and I cleaned our windows and took down the curtains and washed them. After that, I removed the cheap plastic blinds the former owners had and replaced them with roller shades that do a better job of blocking the light so that Andy can sleep now that he is on the third shift. Alright, maybe I have not been a complete slacker, but I did not do what I wanted to do:

1. Arrive home from Florida and put away all the clothes from the suitcases (still not done)
2. Finish all laundry, including fresh sheets on my bed (alright, did the sheets)
3. Clean the bathrooms (does cleaning the toilets count?)
4. Go grocery shopping (Seriously, have had to do this several time, it was like Andy was starving for food by the time we got home; and the baby is eating 6 jars of baby food a day!)
5. Finish painting the dining room (has been unfinished since last November; don't look up anyone)
6. Start painting the finished basement (have had the paint for nearly a year)
7. Weed the flower beds (too hot)
8. Finish organizing the office (the computer sucks me in)
9. Finish sorting BJ's clothing and figure out where I put the shelves to his bookcase (it has only been without shelves since before he was born!)
10. Create Pre-k lessons for my husband to follow with MM so that she continues to progress even though we can not afford daycare this year (does thinking really hard about this count?)

So you see why I just want to sit around and play with the children.

more semi- frugal moments

While visiting my mother in Florida, I went to a Winn Dixie. I saw a woman who had organized her coupons by category and had a list of products and prices per store. I had an ah-ha moment. My mom and I went through all the coupons she had saved from the Sunday paper down there, and we clipped anything that looked like it could be a deal. In fact, while there, I was able to use coupons to get an $8.99 package of diapers for only $5.49. When I got home, I found a $5 photo album and then bought post-it note tabs to make categories. I made sections for store coupons, dairy, baby, frozen, snacks, toiletries and miscellaneous. I then decided to keep receipts from the stores I go to so that I could look at what I buy and how much. I will make a list of products, prices and stores with the best values. After getting the photo album organized (the sleeves allow me to put coupons in chronological order), I was able to go to Giant and save nearly $50! In addition, Giant has gas bonus points. For every $1 spent, I get a point; after 100 points, I get $0.10 off per gallon of gasoline. After my last visit to the store, I had earned $0.40 off per gallon. Yeah me.

It was fun trying to find things that were both on sale at the store and ones that I had a coupon for. While I am not a coupon queen yet, I am trying to do what I can to save money where-ever possible. I wish that more gluten-free items were on sale and/or I could find any coupons!

I also live close to the Corn Wagon. For those who live nearby, it is well known for great, fresh corn on the cob. Right now their price is 13 for $2.50. I am planning on visiting it tomorrow to stock up on fresh veggies and I think I will see about freezing some of the corn so that we can have corn on the cob in October!

On a side note, the Clinique face lotion that I love, but is a little pricey, is almost half off at the outlets 20 minutes from my house. I bought my small container in February and I still have not finished it. So, it is a semi-frugal, semi-splurge item.

A recipe for Gluten-free Date bars that are super!

My mom found this recipe and forwarded to me. It is super and is loved by those who do not have to have a Gluten-free diet. I hope you like it. I will try to post more recipes in the future.

Gluten-Free Date Bars

3/4 cup gf flour mix: 1/4 cup rice flour
1/4 cup sweetened rice flour

1/4 cup cornstarch



1 tsp baking powder

1/4 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp unflavored granulated gelatin

1 tsp cinnamon

1/4 tsp salt

1 cup sugar

1 cup chopped dates

1 cup chopped pecans

2 eggs

1 tsp vanilla extract.



1. Adjust rack 1/3 up from bottom & preheat to 375.

2. Line a 9" square pan w/aluminum foil and brush or spread butter over foil.

3. Mix together in medium bowl: flour mix, baking powder, baking soda, gelatin, cinnamon, salt and sugar (first 7 ingredients).

4. Add chopped dates and toss with fingers to coat. Then add nuts and toss with fingers to coat.

5. Beat eggs and vanilla well and add to other ingredients. Stir thoroughly until all dry ingredients have been moistened.

6. Spread dough evenly in prepared pan. Bake 25 minutes. Remove from over. Let stand 10 minutes. Cover with rack and invert.

7. Remove pan and foil. Cover with rack, invert and let cool right side up.

8. Cut into bars or squares.

Storytime Live

While visiting my parents in Florida, my mom, MM, BJ and I had the chance to go to Orlando to see Nick Jr's Storytime Live. MM and BJ loved the music and their favorite characters- Kai-lan, Backyardigans, Wonder Pets and Dora- were the featured stories. In addition to these, there were interludes with Moose A. Moose and Zee D. Bird. There were favorite songs, dances and puzzle time. MM was very happy and BJ "danced" on my lap. It was my first experience with going to a children's only event and must say that they behaved very well for being mostly under seven.

Now, my mom always says to say something pleasant before criticizing, because nothing is all bad, there is always good. And there was, but some things could have been improved upon, especially since they were asking for $28 per person (including for my 7 month old!).

Our adventures began with Moose and Zee doing puzzle time. If they had just had the actor's face covered, it would have helped, but seeing his face and hearing his Urkle voice, made some the the older audience members boo him. Yes, boo him. Why not pre-record the voice of Moose, make the costume cover the actor's face a-la theme park style, and then it would have been great!

The first story was Kai-lan. It was fun and MM really liked the story; however, the speed at which the story was delivered was break-neck! It was almost like they chose a 30 minute story and felt the need to condense it to 20 minutes. Now, I know that children do not have a long attention span, but it was hard to follow the story because everything was done so quickly. There was not easy transitions from one thing to another, it was even hard to understand what they were saying because they were speaking so quickly. Now, I teach language as my profession and if I was was having trouble with it, I am sure that my 3 year old was. If they just slowed the delivery a little, it would have been super.

The second story featured the Backyardigans. The costumes were great but they showed the actors' faces which became an issue when they changed into their costumes for the adventure. If they had just put on a little face make-up to go along with the character they were portraying, it would have helped. Once the Backyardigans were in "Filthyham" it just looked like people in over-sized costumes; you no longer made any connections to Tyron, Uniqua, Pablo, Tasha or Austin. The story was good though.

After an intermission, it was time for the Wonder Pets. From the advertising on Nick Jr. I knew that I would be seeing puppeteers. I was prepared for that; however, the advertising made you think that the puppets were much larger. Perhaps if we were in the first 10 rows, it would have been better, but once you got up a little, all you could really focus on were the puppeteers pushing their puppets around. The story was good, but the puppeteers were too distracting. Even MM, when telling her father about it later, said that they were not the real Wonder Pets but pretend Wonder Pets! It was going to be a huge leap anyway, so why not make the puppets larger or find shorter puppeteers?

The final story was Dora. It was great; could have been slower, but it was not as fast as Kai-lan. MM loved it and the audience did too. They loved Swiper the Fox and Map. The production did a good job making the audience feel like they were seeing an episode of Dora. The show ended with a dance finale with most of the characters on stage (some of the actors did double duty so not all characters could be on stage). When it ended, we were able to quickly leave the theater and find the bathrooms.

We decided to use the bathrooms before heading back on the road; not wishing to push our luck with the recently potty trained MM. While in the bathroom, MM suddenly began playing with a Wonder Pet doll. Neither Mom or I knew where she had gotten it from. We asked several people, but could not find it's owner. So we cleaned it off with wipes to be on the safe side and let her have it. She has since played with it every time she watches the Wonder Pets on Nick. After the bathroom break, we got her a Storytime Live bag to remember the experience and then headed out into 98 degree Orlando heat.

Overall, the experience was good. It is a shame that they did not show this to a test audience of children before they headed out. Maybe they did, but I bet you that they did not ask the right questions!

Why I dislike Capital One

About five years ago, Capital One offered me an amazing deal: $10,000 at 6.99% and $6,000 at 8.99% locked in and would never go up as long as I did not become more than 30 late in a payment. What a deal! I consolidated some of my foolish credit card balances and finished paying a loan that was at 9.99%. Once I had the amounts on my card (and still had a balance before), I stopped making purchases because new purchases would be at 19.99%. I steadily paid down the amount on the card and did not use the card at all for over a year when they changed my purchase rate to 29.99%. Well, no worries, I cut up the card to make sure I would never use it even by accident.  I got the balance down by $4,000, I got a call from Capital One saying that they had reviewed my account and decided to drop my credit limit to within $400 of what I had paid the card down to. So, knowing the debt to credit ratio issue and my credit score, I was mad, but also knowing that if I closed the card, it also impacted my credit score, I decided to pay even more on the card to get the balance down. With last week's payment, the card balance came down to under $10,000. I was very happy because it gave me $7,000 available credit and it looks much better for my credit score. Three days after my payment, I got a call from Capital One and they told me that they were reducing my available credit to $10,200! In one fell swoop, they took away my wonderful debt to income ratio and made it look like I had maxed out my card! Oh, and two months ago I got a notice that they were going to give me an annual fee of $39!

Now, I am not an angel and I have forgotten to pay the card and been up to a week late a few times, but have never gotten even close to 30 days late. I have started to pay online so that I did not have to rely on the mail because if it got to them a day late, I got to pay a $39 late charge. However, whenever I get any head-way on the balance, they do this to me. I have not used the card in five years and this is my punishment.

So, if you have Capital One and you pay off your balance each month, expect to get an annual fee. If you have Capital One card and you do not use it anymore because you are paying off the balance, expect them to take away your available credit each time you reach a reasonable available credit amount. I am beginning to think I will focus as much attention as possible on getting rid of my balance with Capital One and only use my credit union credit card. My credit union has never been underhanded in anyway. Once I get my finances under control (Andy just got a full time job, yeah!), I am thinking cash only from now on.



Now, to compound things, insurance companies look at your credit score to determine your premium. Due to my husband's two accidents in three years, my 23 year association with Erie Insurance came to an abrupt end. I had to shop for car insurance with a husband who had two accidents within three years and now my credit score just took a hit! Needless to say I am very unhappy. I have decided to go with Allstate, but am getting nailed with a premium that is twice as much as I paid before. I decided not to go with Progressive because they hold any accident (even ones you were not responsible for) against you. My husband was stopped in his tanker truck and a car lost control of his car and went under the tanker; Progressive is holding that accident against Andy even though he did not do anything and did not get charged.

I know the economy is slow, but come on!

Close call

As I stated in a previous blog, I am visiting my parents in Florida. What I did not state was that they live in a place called The Villages. It is a community of 55+, active adults. Most things can be accessed by golf carts and they have every imaginable activity to fill one's days. My parents love it here; I am getting bored. The one activity that I can do with two small children is go to the family pool which is about 1.5 miles away. I have met several families with children close to my children's ages which has been nice.

The other day I was talking to another mother whose children were close in age to MM. Her son was working on swimming under water and her daughter was still in water wings. During the course of our conversation, MM and her daughter were swimming near each other and playing well together. The other woman's daughter then decided to remove her water-wings because she was staying close to us on the steps. All was going well until she slipped off the final step; however, neither of us noticed her going under. I saw her but did not see her. I do not know what made me ask my daughter if she was ok (she was floating in her full body swimmy), but when I did, the other mother noticed her daughter.

The girl had inhaled some water, but not a lot. Her mom held her almost upside down and pounded on her back and the little girl immediately began to cry. She was bright red while she was crying, but then became quite pale. The other mother is a nurse so she knew immediately what to do; thankfully because no one else at the pool seemed to notice anything was wrong. MM was upset because the other mom had bumped into her while trying to get to her daughter so I had an upset daughter while trying to be helpful. Needless to say, everyone was upset and we all decided to call it a day.

I went to the pool today and the little girl and her brother were there with their grandparents. I spoke to the grandparents about the aftermath and agreed that it would have been so easy for the little girl to have been under longer. I was just very happy that not only was she ok, but she wanted to go back to the pool and was happy to play again with MM. I did not ask, but I had a feeling that her mother would have liked to super glue the swimmies onto her arms.

I will say this experience has really made me want to bubble wrap my children! I am very nervous about having all the responsibility for the safety of my children. What if I am distracted and my daughter goes under as well? What if the baby's floaty flips over and I am unable to save him? Where is that line of being careful but not so careful that you stifle? I do not remember having all these types of fears about the world around me until I had children. I am not as adventurous as I once was because I am now more worried. Perhaps I have found the secret of the perceived maturity of others: have children and become more cautious!

The kindness of strangers

I may or may not have said that I was using this summer to do some traveling. Nothing grand, but one trip required me to board a flight with my children in tow. I would like to state that moving a three year old, a seven month old and luggage around by myself was more difficult than I had planned. I will have to say that it would have been impossible had it not been for the kindness of strangers.

The first kind man was at BWI airport. Andy had to drop me off and go to park the car. I was left struggling with a wayward luggage cart, a wired three year old who had a harness on (I am not going to apologize!) and a stroller. As I moved two steps forward and one step back, suddenly the luggage cart began to cooperate. I looked up and saw a lovely 6'4" (yes I can tell by looking) man from Houston, Texas who was pushing the cart for me. He stayed with me until just before I got to the check in! I had gone past at least 30 people who just watched me struggle and who just stared at me like I was some kind of freak before my gentle giant came to my rescue.

The next kind person was the grandmotherly person who stood behind me waiting to check in. She watched me struggle a little, but then realized that I was going to block everyone from moving their luggage forward unless she helped me along. She pushed the luggage cart forward about ten feet for me, which helped clear the way for everyone else. I would like to say that the next kind person was the check in clerk, but she seemed really put out with having to deal with me.

There really needs to be a better way of going through security when you have small children. For those who have had to do this, you know what I am talking about. You all know that you have to take your shoes off, but so do the children. Then, holding onto your infant and small child (harness off), you have to collapse your stroller, push it through to scan, turn your car seat upside down to push through to be scanned, go through the metal detector, wait for stroller, car seat, shoes, harness and carry-on to come through and then load everything up again. The security people were nice, but unrealistic. I was told that I could not put BJ down on the table-top because some child had fallen off a few years ago, so I had to figure out how to hold onto an infant and assemble everything. It would have been super to have had a room to go into and been scanned there; a place that I would not have had so much trouble juggling everything and two small children. There was a truly amazing woman behind me: she had four small children and had to move all of them through security by herself. I do not know how she did it!

On the flight, there was a lovely lady who had the misfortune of sitting beside me. She did not speak English, but with my half Spanish and her little bit of English, we managed to get along well. She was so nice that she even offered to allow BJ to lay across her so he would nap better. I am hopeful that I have an equally nice person for the return trip. The attendant was also helpful once we landed, holding onto MM while I got BJ into his car seat and stroller.

Once I got out of the gate, I had to look for the baggage claim which was a new challenge. At the Orlando airport you have to take a tram to another part of the airport, then go across a lovely plaza to the escalators to locate the baggage claim area. The only problem is that if you need to have an elevator, the signs are about as clear as mud. I was just enough tired at this point, that I stood in the middle of the plaza and said very loudly, "I need an elevator!" Someone was kind enough to point one out and I was on the move.

I know that I would not have had as enjoyable of a trip without the help of strangers. I do not think that I deserve to have help because I had small children, but it was wonderful that there were people who took pity on me. I will definitely help anyone I find in a similar position in the future.

On vacation?

My sister Debbie lives in Virginia Beach, VA. She is planning on finishing the remodel of her house and then put it on the market, so she invited us (my sister's children, my children and me) for a week of beach time. Well, I should say sort of beach time since we are redhaired/ fair skinned and so time at the beach is really from 5pm until 8:30 pm. Plus, since she is a resident, we only pay $2 for parking after 5 pm.

For those who know about the area, one way to get there is to travel along the bridge/tunnel system that connects the Delmarva peninsula to mainland Virginia. We left from Lancaster, PA around 2:30 in the afternoon, made a few stops, and arrived in Virginia Beach around 9 pm. We got off the bridge and BANG! some local kids shot out my back window! Thank God for tempered glass because the window was right beside my three year old's head. My insurance got my window replaced by the next day, but boy will this be a memorable vacation!

I had gotten a blow up pool for 6 at the end of the year clearance sales last year, so I brought it down. We put it in the backyard so that the kids could play in the water and be in the shade. Last night we built a Girl Scout campfire, made gluten-free smores, roasted hot dogs and got bitten by mosquitoes! I made homemade potato salad to enjoy with our hot dogs, but the girls were so full from the other stuff, that not much was eaten.

I have been the chief cook and bottle washer since arriving on Thursday night. It has been necessary so that our gluten free diet is taken care of, but also since my sister is really good at construction, but not so hot in the kitchen. I made up a menu so the kids could know in advance what we would be having and therefore would not be faced with a meal that they do not like. I even brought down my bread machine so that we could have fresh bread and use it to make pizza dough. The downside of this is that I am spending loads of time in the kitchen. I am beginning to appreciate my foremothers who were in the kitchen all the time!

MM has been in hog heaven. She loves her cousins and she is old enough to play with them without driving them too crazy. Right now she is getting into her bathing suit so that she can get into the pool with her cousins. We found a bathing suit that looks like a ballet outfit, complete with a too-too at Target. She already had a two piece bathing suit, but since we will be flying down to my parents' house to spend time there, she would need to have two suits. The most important reason is because she has recently decided that she wants to be a mermaid, ballerina, princess in a castle, Dora, Little Bill, Fairy, superhero.  I figured she can pretend to be a mermaid ballerina for now.

Sorry to be away for so long...

I had no idea I had not updated for so long. Well, let me tell you what has been going on since the end of May...

MM is still not potty trained but we are going longer and longer with big girl undies, so I think that having me home now will help. When she gets too excited, she doesn't make it to the bathroom in time. Today, Andy was chasing her around the backyard with BJ in the stroller and she got too excited and had to be changed. But, she went potty this morning and had a dry pull up, so full potty training is just around the corner.

BJ is getting better and better about his digestion and we have managed to get him off all his meds! Now, of course, he is teething and we are dealing with drool, temperatures and crankiness. We go for a well baby on Tuesday and I am fully expecting my little moose to be well over 20 pounds. He wants to crawl in the worst way, but can not figure out how to get his knees down. He is so strong that he is doing push-ups instead (we are talking full marine push-ups!). Many times he is happy just standing on my lap. I think he is going to be one of those babies who wants to bypass the whole crawling thing and go straight to walking. MM is in trouble when he gets mobile. He is going to get her back for all those times he had to lay there helpless while she put his teether on his head or stickers or corn or an ice cube. At six months he is only about 8 inches shorter than she is at 3.

For my birthday, I got a bread machine. My husband is enjoying the freshly baked bread and I am trying different recipes. We have had different bread each week. I have done the boxed mixes so far and then I will branch out into the other recipes. I really like the Gluten-free Pantry brand. It is the cheapest mix and bakes up nicely. For bread more like Panera bread, Schar's bread mix is more expensive but the taste is richer too. I did try Pamela's Products best bread mix first, but I think I made a mistake with it since it came out small and more like sourdough. I would say, though, that having the break machine has been great. I figure that I have gotten more than 2x the amount of bread out of each loaf than I was getting when I bought the pre-made Gluten free bread and I have not spent anywhere near the amount of money. Even the Schar bread mix being close in price to the pre-made loaf was still cheaper and I was able to get twice as much bread. I will keep trying out recipes and report back. When I have perfected any, I will share what I did. So far I have not had to use the Gluten free setting on the bread machine even though one of the brands mentioned above said to do it; the recipe worked fine on a regular setting. My original thought was that I would break even with this machine when I had made 15 loaves of bread; now I am thinking I will break even closer to 8!

I am looking forward to the summer off. I have decided not to teach summer school and actually take the time to be with my family. I have missed out so much by going back to work when I did; I did not need to spend any more time away from them. Yes it will hurt us financially to not have the extra income, but I figure I will not be driving as much and I can really be frugal with meals since I will be home to cook, we will be okay. The children are only young once and I am not going to feel guilty about not spending time with them. They have enough hand-me-down clothes from cousins that I do not have to buy any clothes or toys (the neighbors gave us their swing-set!) so they are set. I am looking forward to catching fire-flies and playing "soccer" with MM in the backyard.

On turning 39...

Well, I have made it to 39! It is hard to believe that I am this old yet do not feel like I am that old. It's funny how I thought that by certain ages I would have had wisdom and maturity, but now that I am 39, I guess I will always be this immature!

My mom had a difficult time turning 39, 40 and then 41, but then did not care how old she was. I thought I would feel the same way, but I never really cared about how old I got, except when there was a possibility that I would not have children. Once I had MM, I did not care how old I got. Now I have two beautiful children and a wonderful husband, and I have done more in my 39 years than many have done in a life time.

So let me reflect...

1. My parents encouraged my independence and allowed me to go away to Girl Scout Camp in the summer

2. I worked for my family at their store which gave me amazing skills and experiences

3. My parents also thought that going to the theater was important so I got to see Broadway musicals (not on broadway, but the classics) and even got the chance to travel to New York to see actual on Broadway plays and musicals.

4. I traveled to England to study for a year and made lifetime friends and began my love affair with Britain.

5. I have traveled to 14 countries and many states in the USA

6. I have gotten two undergraduate and one graduate degree

7. I was in the Girl Scouts, the Boy Scouts (Explorer Post) and Job's Daughters (Honored Queen).

8. I have managed a convenience store, worked for the United States Government on an Army post, worked as a cashier and been a teacher. Each job has helped me be a better person and educator.

9. I am a mom and a wife. Any success I have had here is a result of my previous experiences and opportunities my parents gave me.

So, thanks to my parents for giving me life and a life worth living.

Happy Birthday MM!

I think I have spoiled my daughter. Ok, yes I have spoiled her. She recently turned 3 years old and I decided to make it a special time. Birthdays are always important. It is the only holiday that is specifically yours; all other holidays have to be shared, but unless you have a twin, or were unlucky to be born on the same date as another relative, that day is yours. What is interesting about my family is that my dad and my mother's dad had to share a birthdate, my sister and my mother-in-law share a birthdate and I share a birthdate with my father-in-law. So, birthdays need to be special.

My daughter goes to daycare and so I made sure that her friends at daycare got treats just like they came to a birthday party at my house. Then, on Saturday, I had a birthday party for MM at my house. On Sunday, the day of my mother-in-law's 80th birthday, we had a party over at my sister-in-law's house, but with all the children, MM thought it was another party for her. Then she was taken out to Friendly's for a big girl meal and ice cream by my sister and her daughter because they could not make the Saturday event.

My daughter's theme was Nei Hao Kai Lan. Let me tell you how hard it was to find that stuff! My mom found some on the internet and I ordered it through them. I found Chinese take-out containers to put the treats in and found stickers with Kai Lan on them. I also found Chinese yo-yo's to put in their boxes. I made gluten free cupcakes and found special paper to use to make it looke like the cake was in a Chinese lantern. I did not go over the top, but it was obvious there was a Chinese theme. Miriam got a goody box for each day she had a party and she uses her boxes as little purses. The best part of the party was getting the pictures of her running around and having fun.

So, my daughter is going to expect another three-day event for her next birthday! I am just glad that everyone could make it and my first real party for her was so successful. I look forward to many more.

Happy Mother's Day

My husband will never be considered romantic, thoughtful, yes, romantic no. I have hinted repeatedly that I want to have flowers for my birthday and for mother's day or just because. My mom even texted him to tell him that the local grocery store had long stem roses on sale for $15! Hint, hint, hint. In the past, I have managed to score flowers a grand total of three times. Well, I guess four if you count him picking flowers out of my garden and putting them in a glass for me, but since I did not want him to decapitate the few remaining flowers I had left in my yard, I am not counting it.

So this past weekend was Mother's Day. I can honestly say that I am really a mom now that I have two children. How mothers of more children keep their sanity is beyond me. I am still so sleep deprived that I cannot imagine voluntarily doing this all again. Sorry, mom, no more grandbabies from me! Anyway, my Mother's Day gift from my mom was her watching the children so I could do some cleaning at my house. My sister (more my sister than me) and I took our mother out for dinner. My dad had to share is 70th birthday with Mother's Day, so we treated him to dinner too.

Now what gift would you have expected my husband to get for me for Mother's Day? I have given him hints, mom has given him hints, and my daughter has given him hints. Yes you guessed it! A toilet!

The downstairs toilet had to be replaced. He bought a new one and installed it telling me Happy Mother's Day! To be fair, he also bought two chairs for the patio. I guess that beats a blender.

Gluten free products I like

I would just like to say that just because I like it doesn't mean that you will, but I have tested these items on my daughter and my husband and gotten a thumbs up review. My husband does not have celiac and likes his bread, so finding things that he is okay with is important.

First let me say that the bread, pizza crusts, and muffins you can buy from UDI's are wonderful, I wish we had the products in my grocery store! I am thinking of petitioning a local store to get their items in. If you do not live near a store with these products, you can buy online, but shipping is a bear! http://www.udisglutenfree.com/

I am also a fan of going to the local Asian markets to get their rice pasta. Many of their products are just made from three ingredients and have English labels. I find that their rice pasta is great and much, much cheaper than going to the gluten free section of the grocery store to get rice pasta. I swear gluten-free labeling is code for "we can charge you whatever we like!" I do however like Mrs. Leaper's rice pasta. If I spelled that wrong, sorry, but it is shaped rice pasta so children will like it. It cooks up the best out of the supermarket brands.

Glutino products are great. They have frozen pizza shells, cereal, snack bars, pretzels... and much of it tastes like regular gluten-based food. I could eat a whole bag of their pretzels! When my daughter was younger I gave her the Glutino version of Cheerios and she loved them. I found a website that sells their products, but many of them can be found in the grocery store.
http://www.glutenfree.com/index.cfm?dsp=public.products.search_results&by_fixture=&by_style=&by_brand=&by_price=&search_text=Glutino&gclid=CK_9sM6Xr6ECFU8K2god2RPRAQ

Here is the official site: http://www.glutino.com/

Chex cereals are now almost entirely gluten-free. Obviously the wheat ones are not, but you can find rice, corn, chocolate and cinnamon gluten-free Chex in the cereal isle. Betty Crocker also has cake mixes and chocolate chip cookie mixes that are gluten free. Yum!

For great chicken, Bell and Evans has a whole line of gluten free chicken. It tastes great and since my daughter's daycare serves chicken nuggets, I can send them along so she does not feel left out. Here is the link: http://www.bellandevans.com/index.cfm?act=gluten_free


I have found that you can use many of the above items in regular recipes and they taste great. When I make pasta dishes, I use rice pasta or Mrs. Leaper's pasta instead of wheat pasta and it tastes just as good. Glutinos pizza crusts are great for making pizza. For spaghetti sauce I like to use Delgrosso and can usually get it on sale.

Of course you all know that fruits and veggies are gluten free and since the weather will be improving, we can enjoy several months of great local produce. For dessert, nothing beats Breyer's ice cream. The vanilla has very few ingredients and all of them are gluten free.

For those who are super sensitive to even air born particles, read the labels. Many companies are getting better about listing possible allergens.

I hope this helps. I will continue to post items when I find them, so check back soon!

Gluten free recipe: arroz con leche (rice pudding)

I found a recipe for Arroz con leche on Foodnetwork.com. The recipe I liked the best was from Ingrid Hoffmann. I made it for my students because they were taking the PSSAs (standardized test in PA) and I wanted to make sure they had full tummies while testing. I tripled the recipe but only used two cans of the sweetened condensed milk so it was not as sweet. I took in granulated Splenda for those students who just had to have it sweeter. I served it warm but it is good cold too.

Ingredients:

1 C long- grain white rice
2 cinnamon sticks
1 Tbsp lemon zest
3 whole cloves
4 C water
1 egg
3 C whole milk
1 (12 oz) can of sweetened condensed milk
1 Tbsp vanilla extract
1/2 C raisins, optional

Soak the rice, cinnamon sticks, lemon zest and whole cloves in the water in a heavy saucepan for 1 hour. After soaking, bring the rice mixture to a boil on high heat, uncovered. When it starts to boil, lower the heat to medium and cook for 10 to 12 more minutes or until water is almost evaporated.  While rice is cooking, beat the egg in a bowl. Add the milk and stir well to mix. Add the egg mixture, vanilla extract and condensed milk to the rice and cook over medium-low heat, stirring carefully, until it thickens slightly or until desired consistency, about 25 to 35 minutes. Let cool uncovered.


My students think that I'm more like a mom now and it was such a comfort food to them that I think they did better on the test. The best part is that I could eat with them and not say, "I'm sorry, I'm allergic."

The fun continues...

I do not understand why people need TVs when they have 2-3 year olds in the house. MM is so full of hilarious adventures that I do not miss those tired sitcoms. Here are a few from this week:

1. On Sunday, MM was in a dress and decided to go commando. This however was not enough, she went outside, lifted her dress and then peed on the driveway. My husband was outside talking to the neighbor who alerted Andy to MM's show.

2. MM was walking around saying "Hmmmm, where is it, hmmmm, where is it?" so I replied, "Hmmmm, I don't know." She turned to me and said, "Hey, that's my line!"

3. Upon waking from an afternoon nap crying from a dream, she informed me that the "Damn monster" was after her! Thank you potty mouth daddy.

4. Before leaving the house, she must give her father a "Mooch" (smooch) and gets upset if she can not also give one to "baby brudder."

5. MM has always liked showers and did not want a bath. I recently got her back into a bath because she was really dirty from decapitating flowers in the backyard. I got her to lay back so I could work on the dirt in her hair one time, so now she wants to lay back all the time. She puts her fingers in her ears to keep out the water (she did this on her own) and sings because she likes how it sounds half submerged. She will also "swim" in the tub and calls it her "pond."

6. She has figured out that the sound "suh" refers to color in Chinese from watching Kai Lan and she knows red and green in Chinese. The other day she had two toys in her hand- one red and the other blue. She said, "Look mommy, hun suh (red)...pause... and blue suh!" She will randomly say things to me in Chinese and Spanish, luckily I have watched the shows with her so I know what she is saying!

7. I am still pumping breast milk for BJ and start each morning at 5:45 am so that I can pump and get ready for work. Yesterday MM got up at 6 am, stood at the top of the stairs to yell down to me "Mommy? You pumping your meatballs?" I have not figured out why my breasts are meatballs, but I am the only one who has them.

8. After seeing her brother trying to roll over, she told him to watch her she would show him how to do it.

9.  When I got her a coloring book with crayons, she spent two hours not coloring her book, but arranging and rearranging her crayons so that she could knock them down in different patterns and on different surfaces.

10. She decided to color in the TV screen while watching a shape matching game during intermission on Nick Jr. I know this because she smiled at me and told me she colored in the circle for Moose and Zee. I love magic eraser.

11. She turns on my radio clock and dances in front of my bedroom mirror like she is in Fame or Splash Dance.

As I said before, I am trying to find the blessings in all she does because I want to keep my blood pressure down.

Update on BJ: he is finally sleeping better and less fussy. I am hoping to get him off medicines in the next month or so. He is also smiling and cooing more. His favorite time is, of course, 3 am.

You can tell you have a toddler living with you if...

It has finally happened. I have finally started to do some of those things I said I would not do if I ever had a child. All the mothers of older children are now saying to themselves, "See, I told you once you had your own chidren you would understand..." Well, I still am not using food as a bribe (yet) but I have found myself crumbling to the temper tantrum of a 2 year old. As you all know, it is just easier than an epic battle especially when time together is so precious.

So, you can tell we have a toddler in the house because of a few clues...

1. You begin telling time by the shows on Nick Jr. As in, "when did you last change/ feed the baby?" "Oh, the Wonder Pets had just come on." "Was it the first one or the second show?"...

2. You say to your two year old "The Backyardigans just went off, you know it is bed time."

3. You get your child to brush her teeth because Dora the Explorer says to.

4. What is served for dinner is determined by whether or not it will pack easily for lunch at daycare the next day.

5. You find yourself humming the theme song of the Wonder Pets even when the children are out of earshot.

6. You learn to sleep in the most contorted positions to accommodate the two year old who needs to sleep between you and your husband after 3 am nightly.

7. You learn to savor any chance you get to go to the bathroom in peace and quiet.

8. You find out from the newspaper the next day about breaking news because you have not been able to watch an adult show in months.

9. M & M's are the best way to get your child to use the potty. Oh, shoot! I guess I am bribing with food afterall!


So, if you see me out in public, please forgive me if I have no idea what major news events have occured or if I can not use language that even a two year old can understand. I've been told I will grow out of it!

Flowers

Spring is in the air and flowers are blooming. I have been anxious to see what kinds of flowers will be blooming around my house. At my old house, I knew that there would be tulips, daffodils, hyacinth, crocus, lilacs and a few others that I can not remember the name of. From early spring until late fall, I made sure my garden was full of beautiful flowers and smells. At this new house, I have a much larger canvas to work with. In the city, I had a very small garden in the back of the house and a ten by ten flower bed in the front. At this new house, my front yard is twice the size of both the back and front yards of my city home; I will not get into how big the back yard is. So you can imagine my excitement over mapping out what flowers I could expect to see. I expecially like the view from my kitchen window. I can look out that window and see nothing.

Well, not exactly nothing. I can see what used to be flowers. I recognize the stems and leaves of crocus, daffodils and tulips. If I close my eyes, I can remember their colors before they were decapitated.

My husband has been in the backyard removing a tree and the piles of junk left hidden underneath that tree. Once the tree was down, MM was in the yard "helping" him. What that really means is that she was popping the flowering heads off. I have a lovely bowl of floating heads: daffodils, tulips, crocus, and a few azaleas. She has successfully removed every flower out of the front and back yards. If I had not been careful, when we went for a walk in our development, the neighbors' would have lost their flowers too. Lucky for me, she also likes to pick dandelions so neighbors should be okay with her picking those flowers as long as I keep her away from the others!

The hand continues to heal, but typing still hurts!

They called her Streak

My daughter has always been very confident in her body. She would watch her older cousins do things and think to herself, "I can do it too!" (Remember, MM is going to be three in May.) MM has been walking since she was one and has been thinking that she was capable of doing things well beyond her age group and skill set. If she saw an older child climb something, she would climb it too. If she saw children in the ocean playing, she was there too. You get the idea and can understand why I have so many white hairs.

Recently, MM has been enjoying her ability to take off or put on clothing; mostly take off. I have had a "great" time dressing her in the morning. She can be very opinionated about wearing certain outfits and will take off offending clothing. I have had to redress her as many as three times in the morning. Usually her biggest final rebellion seems to be focused on not wearing socks even if it is colder than 32 degrees. She will take off her shoes and socks on the way to school which delays me further. She also wants to wear clothing with as many pockets as possible and wear shoes that can easily come off while playing. She loves wearing dresses because it is easier to use the potty but hates to be put in tights (she will exhaust herself trying to get out of them). My husband does not understand these acts of rebellion so I do not encourage him to dress her in the morning. When he does, she requires 15 minutes of holding to overcome her trauma of being forced into an offending outfit.

Last night's event was bound to happen. It was damp outside, but not bad in temperature, so Andy took the children out for a walk while I prepared dinner. After about 15 minutes, MM knocked on the door and came into the house because she had fallen and gotten wet. She came in, took off her shoes and pants and turned on the TV. I went back to fixing dinner. A few minutes later I heard the sidedoor open again and heard MM struggling with her baby stroller. I walked over and saw her new outfit: she had replaced her wet shoes with a new, dry pair, she had on her Dora the Explorer backpack and a smile. Yup, that's it. She had previously run into the garage with just boots on, knowing that she should not be outside and willing to just run out and come back in before being seen, but this time, she knew what she was doing. She wanted to go out into the neighborhood. Luckily my husband was still outside and told her that she needed to go back in and get dressed. I met her at the door and helped her take off the backpack and got as far as a long sleeved shirt before she took off again. She finally allowed me to put a pull-up and pants on her, but she was decidedly unhappy about it.

One of the things I think she likes about her natural state is that her long hair tickles her back. She has discovered that if she puts her head back, her long hair touches the top of her tush. After a shower, she will stand her her room and put her head back so that she can feel her wet hair touch as far down as the backs of her thighs. She also likes to stand in front of my full mirror and watch herself. I know this is all part of her overall awareness of herself and I am trying really hard not traumatize her. I want her to be proud of her body without setting her up to be a future stripper. I guess if my sister Laura is any example, running around naked until aged 4 does not predispose a child to being a stripper or a porn star later, so I guess I'm safe.

On being clumsy

I wish I could say I'm normally a graceful person, but I can't. In fact, it would be safe to say that I'm not even able to put my name in the same sentence as the word! Well, once again I've managed to hurt myself doing a simple task: putting the garage door down. The doctor said that I was lucky, he has seen people chop off their fingertips doing the same thing as I did. I was lucky to not even crush them! I am going to have very sollen and bruised fingers for a while though. We have been having trouble with our garage door, so I manually closed it, thus pinching my fingers between two panels. Luckily the children were already in the car. I went into the house, grabbed a bag of frozen veggies, downed 1000 mg of Motrin, drove 15 minutes to intersect with Andy who was at church, handed off the children, and drove to the ER. I even managed to not cry and upset the children until I got to Andy and then I burst out crying.

So, I will only be writing short blogs for a while. Typing right handed takes a very looonnng time!

Blessings

I have been having several stressful weeks as work which has led to me forgetting to post and to not value my family as much as I should. I would like to change both of these now.

Having two small children, a busy career and pushing the big 4-0 (next year) has really exhausted me, so much that I have not stopped to really appreciate the little things. When I was younger, I really wanted a family and could think of little else. As I got older and it became more obvious that I was not going to have children, I could barely block out the loud tick-tick of my biological clock. So, one would think that I should be over the moon by having two children now. I am; I just forgot that I wanted them so badly.

Let's begin with BJ. It was a high risk pregnancy from start to finish. I worried almost the entire time that something would be terribly wrong. When he was born, I was so relieved that everything was fine. His digestive issues and failure to latch properly were minor compared to what the possibilities were. BJ's colic is getting better and better, but the spitting up continues (I hear specialist) so I have forgotten to appreciate the lack of crying. The other day I watched a news segment about a woman losing her son to stillbirth; that could have been me. At that moment, I remembered to be appreciative of the blessing that is my son. Things could have been worse; I at least have my son. I am now trying to appreciate him more even when he wakes me up at 4 am and refuses to let me sleep anymore.

Until I got pregnant with MM, I did not think I could get pregnant. Celiac disease is one of the culprits in preventing pregnancy. She is my sunshine. In fact, I sing "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine..." to her and add the verse "You are my MM, my only MM, you make me happy when skies are gray, you'll never know dear how much I love you, please don't take my MM away." When MM is writing on the walls, refusing to use the potty and throwing temper tantrums, I need to remember that she allowed me to be a mommy first.

Finally, to Andy. Sure he is a grouch and a farmer boy, but I love him. He cares for me like no other person has. He chips in with chores and daddy duties like my father never did. He is hard working, loving and caring, and provides for us the best he can. He makes the best mashed potatoes even when he burns the rest of the meal (he will never be a chef!) and will help clean up the kitchen without being asked. He also allowed me to be a mommy even if I just gave birth to his clones. It is hard to remember to be loving sometimes, especially with the day to day grind, but I am going to try to be more appreciative of all his efforts.

I am dedicated to trying to find the happy each day and remember all my blessings.

It finally happened...

It's official, I finally had someone walk in on me while I was pumping at school! Luckily the student who was with the staff person did not come into the room! Ugh! I am not sure how much longer I can do this at work; I am seriously stressed now.

On a different note, Andy is taking MM to the mountains this weekend. He figures that he does not have much more time to be "free" before getting a full time job, so he needed to go to the mountains to the hunting cabin now. He is also taking his brother, his best friend, and his nephew. His brother does not have many more springs in the mountains unless he gets a kidney. Andy's friend, Tom, is taking his grandsons who are close to MM's age. I'm glad he is taking MM with him so that I do not have to spend the whole weekend going crazy with two. Besides, MM thinks she is one of the guys anyway. She loves to go up and play in the woods and be rough and tumble. She gets to be dirty, run around and eat junk for a weekend. I've gone up, but it is a little too rustic for me. The cabin has electricity but does not have running water or an inside toilet. I was a Girl Scout, but I can think of other things to do, like clean my house.

I made a list of everything I wish to accomplish. Let's just say I am not going to get any sleep if I am able to complete everything on the list. My sister-in-law is being nice enough to watch BJ for me so that I can try to knock off as many things on my list as possible. My dream is that everything will be done before Andy gets home on Sunday afternoon. I have a dream...

It just keeps getting better!

I am sure most mothers of toddlers will tell you how much "fun" it is having such energetic and curious little people in their homes. At times I am delighted to have such a precocious 2 year old, but as the days of no sleep stretch on, I am having more difficulty stirring up a smile. Don't get me wrong, MM is a happy child who is very imaginative, but since most of the clean up is my responsibility, I find it harder and harder to encourage her creativity. (Yes I struggle with worry that I will stunt her in some way because I am not acting as her constant cheerleader).

On Sunday, MM was in rare form (or maybe not so rare anymore) and I got nothing accomplished. Andy was out, having found some work, so I had the joy of both children who thought it was an hour earlier than it was. MM decided to dump the Mylicon drops (of course it was the last bottle) all over the carpet. I did not realize she had done this until I stepped into the wet spot on the rug and found her hiding behind a chair with the empty bottle behind her back. I knew that Andy had left it where she could get it, so I only fussed at her and told her that she was not to take her brother's medicine again. I then texted Andy and told him he needed to keep all meds on the mantle where she can not reach them. After dinner, while trying to clean up, I noticed that MM was not downstairs any longer; not good. I went upstairs and found her in my room, sitting in the floor, surrounded by hundreds of raisins. She had gotten the brand new large container of raisins, gone upstairs and twirled around and around so she could evenly spread the entire container of raisins to the four corners of my bedroom. Couldn't be her bedroom, no, it had to be mine! After finally cleaning the kitchen and my bedroom, I decided it was bathtime. Just as I had gotten MM undressed, BJ started to cry. It took about 15 minutes to calm him down and I went back to the bathroom. I know, I left her alone too long (no she was not in the bath tub, she likes showers) so what is a toddler to do while in the bathroom? Well, when I opened the door, she was sitting on the toilet, lid down. She looked at me, smiled and said, "I put toilet paper in the toilet! Can I have lemen-ems?" I looked at the previously full roll of paper and knew that my toilet was filled with an entire, brand new roll of toilet paper. It took me 1/2 an hour to unclog it.

To add to the fun, BJ has decided to start confusing his days and nights. He is sleeping during the day and keeping me up 1/2 the night. Sunday night he woke up at 3 am and did not go back to sleep until 5:30 am. Last night, he refused to go to sleep until 11:30, and then woke up at 1:30 and 3:30 and then stayed up at 6. To say that I am sleepless in Lancaster is an understatement!

My very busy week

Wow, this past week was insanely busy. I did not have a chance to post. Lots to tell, so hang on, this will be a long one!

First, let me address work. Once a month we have Professional Development meetings. To get enough time, we have early dismissals on the second Wednesday. On those days, I must teach my entire classload before I get a break. I normally teach periods 1-4, then have lunch and planning, and then finish the day with periods 7 and 8. On these Wednesdays, I have to teach all my classes and then get lunch and planning. After we get all our students out the door, we have three hours of meetings. This time it was actually a good use of our time, they actually gave us information that I could use right away. Much nicer than what I usually get, lots of ideas and no time to implement them. In addition to Wednesday's busy schedule, we had parent conferences on Thursday night. We got to teach the whole day and then stay until 6:30 that night to meet with parents. I ended up staying until 8:30 that night because I had so much to do and Andy already knew I would be coming home later. Once I got home, I had to still pump and correct more papers. By the time I got to bed, I had been awake for 20 hours; which leads me to my second subject.

BJ has been randomly sleeping well, waking up fussing and/or wanting to coo at me at 3 am. First the good news, he slept through the night on Thursday night (thank you God!) and I experienced as close to a good night sleep as I have had since October. I guess that was make up for the previous night in which he woke up a 3 am and would not go back to sleep (which is why Thursday was 20 hours long). On Friday, he decided to cry from 4:30 until 8, then sleep for four hours, wake up at 1 am and then get up to stay at 5 am. It is like he is a drug dealer and sleep is his drug. He gives me only just enough so that I feel good, lulls me into thinking I will get more and then takes it away!

MM is continuing to be creative. I continue to struggle with her using the potty, especially using the potty to go poo-poo. She has decided that if I do not want her to poo-poo in her diaper then she will poo-poo in her play room; I have decided her diaper is okay for now. She has made progress on her drawing skills, I just wish it wasn't my walls she is practicing on. Andy says that he does not sleep while he is watching the children, but the amount of art work I come home to tells me he is taking naps and not realizing it. I will say that Andy is ready to get back to work and I think MM is ready to return to full time daycare. He does not have the patience to put up with such a clever and energetic two year old. Case in point, last night she was given a treat: a small amount of soda with an ice cube (believe it or not, the ice cube was more the treat). After finishing the small amount that I gave her, she requested more. I told her that she needed to eat more of her dinner before she got more. Andy chimed in with his normal gruff "Get to eating!" (he is such a farm boy); MM looked at him and replied "Mommy already told me that," and started to eat more from her plate. I am in so much trouble when she is a teenager!

More MM-isms

Now that MM is nearly three years old, it is amazing what kinds of observations she makes. Some of them are funny when I first hear them; while others are only funny when I look back at them.

1. On the way to school the other day, she saw a house that still had red ribbons on the porch bannister. She said, "Look mommy, that house has hair ties!"

2. MM is working on appropriate responses to coughing and sneezing. She has also learned that if she coughs I offer water, and if she sneezes, I give her a tissue. So, when it is bedtime, she will fake cough so that she can have a drink. She will then fake sneeze and say, " I knee-ezed, I need a tissue." She will also use the fake sneeze to get my attention away from BJ.

3. I had cameo earrings in my ears the other day. When I was putting her into her carseat she observed, "Mommy you have pictures in your ears!"

4. Her father broke the baby swing yesterday manually swinging it too hard. I made the comment that Daddy broke the swing to MM and she responded, "Daddy's in trouble, you need to spank him and put him in time out."

5. I am after my husband about his language all the time, and I told him he had a potty mouth the other day. We were in the doctor's office on Wednesday and Andy let out with a curse word. MM said, "Daddy you need to go to the potty. You have potty mouth!"

6. Again with the cursing. Andy apparently told MM to "get her ass up the stairs" at some point because MM told me to "get you up the stairs you ass" the other night.

7. This morning, MM ran down the stairs to watch her show but then realized that she needed to go potty. However, she stood beside the potty, peed in her pull-up, took it off and sat on the potty. She then informed me that she need to have "lemon-ems" (M&Ms) because she was on the potty.

8. And my favorite right now is her obsession with the paint stirring stick she likes to play with. Andy wrote her name on it so it was hers. She can not say the word stick though. She walks around waving it in the air and says that it is her d**k, "see there's my name!"

So, when she really gets potty mouth as a teenager, I will know where the foundations lay. I wonder how long it will take to undo her special language development when she goes back to full time daycare in April?

Embracing her inner demon

My daughter is in full terrible-two mode. This past weekend is the perfect example. First, a little background. In a never ending struggle to completely potty train MM, I have been putting her in big girl panties. She is all for them until she must interupt her play time to go to the potty, then she is all about putting back on pull-ups. At daycare, she has not had an accident for months; she is dry the whole time. However, at home, she wants the diaper. Things took a turn for the worst this weekend.

On Saturday, MM had an overnight dry pull up. She pee-peed in her potty, got a sticker, and some M&Ms after breakfast (hey, I'm desperate!). I put on her big girl panties, made a big deal out of how special they were and how she was such a big girl! We went pee-pee in the potty again, got a sticker, and some more M&Ms. Things were going well until after dinner. I was in the kitchen washing dishes, MM was watching Nick, Jr. and BJ was in his swing. Suddenly, BJ starts screaming in agony. I rushed over and noticed MM hiding. I asked her what she did and she replied, "I spanked him." "Why?" "Because I did." Ok, I do not spank as a rule unless it is something truly amazing and then it is a swat on the butt so she knows that I am very serious about her never doing again (ie, throwing toys at her brother's head, stepping on her brother when he is on the floor doing tummy time...). I did not spank her, I told her to go to the time out chair which happens to be the same chair she poured liquid Zantac all over. Sooo, while I am dealing with a screaming 3 month old, MM goes to the time out chair, squats, pees and poops! That resulted in her being told to go into her play room (yeah, I know) and not to come out until I told her to.

On Sunday, I had the chance to go through some more boxes in my closet and finally found my jewelry box! I have been wearing the same earrings since August since I could not find the box my husband pack it in. What does this have to do with MM? She, of course, wandered upstairs while I was making lunch and got into it. I found her because she was being too quiet, took my jewelry away from her and told her to stay out of it. (I moved it up higher too). She began crying, went downstairs and told her father that I am "cursing" at her! She gets that word from me fussing at her father to stop cursing in front of her because she is going to have serious truck-driver, potty mouth. I fed her lunch and placed her on the potty, but she did not go. She waited until I walked upstairs to put away laundry, got onto another chair in my living room, squatted and peed! She is revenge peeing!

After that last one, I put her in her pull-up and she walked around saying she was a baby. MM asked for M&Ms, candy, chips and other snack foods, but I told her she was a baby and babies did not get those things. She then asked for milk, so I gave it to her in a baby bottle. We did this for about an hour and then she gave me a hug and said she was no longer a baby but a big girl. But the big girl is now trying to color in the squares on the wallpaper in my kitchen!

Guilt trips and other MM-isms

Perhaps the greatest difficulty in being a working mom is the missing out on milestones. I work for two reasons: 1) I have to, and 2) because I would go insane staying home day-in and day-out. Don't get me wrong, I have a sister who is a stay-at-home mom, I don't know how she does it. I find it hard to be home that much. However, I do miss being home. Sounds crazy, but let me explain. I want to be home to see the milestones in BJ's life. I want to see him smile, roll over, crawl, etc...I want to be home with MM so that I can shape her into the respectful little girl I know she can be (instead of the terrible two she is becoming). When I am home, I need to do so many things that I can not enjoy being home with my children. When I am at work, taking care of others' children, all I can think about is how nice it would be to be home with my children. It is a self- imposed guilt trip, and, to some extent, a societal one as well. I recently read an article about moms in Germany. If you have children, you do not work outside of the home. If you do, you are a bad mom, leaving others to do your parenting. Although it is socially more acceptable to work outside the home here, we are still held to the same standard as German moms. We are "allowed" to work as long as we still do everything we would have done if we had not gone to work.

The other day, as I drove home from a particularly difficult work day, I called my mom to belly-ache about life in general. I got onto the subject of BJ and began crying. It was not fair that I had to go back to work so soon after giving birth, that I have cheated him of cuddle time, that maybe his digestive issues would go away faster if only I was there for him sooner. Additionally, MM, who has always been a good girl has discovered her inner demon and has become a child who must be watched carefully because she will get into trouble (especially around her brother). I wonder, if I had been able to stay home with them, would she be better behaved? Will I raise a daughter who is a bully? Will I raise a daughter who is so desperate for attention that she will do anything to get it? Will she feel loved enough? To add fuel to these feelings, last week on a day she did not have to go to daycare, as I was leaving, she said, "Mommy, don't go, stay here." Yes, I cried on my way to work. At home, my daughter loves me; at work, I am told to go F myself. It is really hard.

Imperfect Motherhood: On removing a bottle of liquid Zantac from the furniture...

Imperfect Motherhood: On removing a bottle of liquid Zantac from the furniture...

On removing a bottle of liquid Zantac from the furniture...

As a mother of a two year old, I am always amazed at how clever/ mischievious she can be. I do not think MM really hit the terrible twos until just a month ago. Perhaps the competition for attention switched a gear in her head, but lately she has become nearly impossible to keep up with. The following is a list of her activities:

1. After finally getting the long wished for liquid Zantac for my son, MM got the bottle and dumped the entire contents of said bottle all over one of my upholstered chairs in the living room. Thankfully we were able to get a refill for the Zantac. I am still working on getting the sticky from the chair.

2. She painted her face with lipstick.

3. She drew on the walls with a magic marker. Thank God for magic eraser!

4. She got an entire bottle of baby powder and dumped it all over herself and her bedroom.

5. She used an entire tube of chapstick on her face and lips.

6. She painted the fireplace hearth with chocolate milk because she wanted to.

7. She took all of her clothes off, put on her boots and ran into the garage. Thankfully the garage doors were closed!

8. She chased the cats from the basement, to the main floor, upstairs and then down again.

9. She poked holes into all my February bills. I only wished I could do this. At the same time, she decorated one of my student's assignments that I had accidently left on the table.

10. She figured out that her play chair is the correct size for getting up onto the vanity in the spare bathroom and got into the basket of soaps, lotions and toothpaste that I had put by the sink for guests to use. The bathroom mirror and MM smelled wonderful, but both needed to be washed afterwards.

I can't wait to see what else she gets into.

Mrs. Grouchy

I have been lucky enough to get a little more sleep this week. BJ was put on liquid Zantac without having to go through an upper GI. I guess I made a convincing enough case for trying the Zantac before such an invasive procedure. This week has been better. Last night wasn't so hot, but since I did not have school today, it did not feel as bad. I am trying to get MM back into her big girl bed now that she is feeling better, but she still wakes up several times a night because she senses I have gone back to my bed.

So why do I feel so grouchy?

Maybe it's the winter blahs? Maybe it is the overall feeling that I am not getting enough sleep? Maybe it is work pressures? Maybe it is the financial strain? It is probably all of those combined. So why do I not handle it better?

It is funny how in our modern age that as women we feel like we are not being the best mom, wife, friend, etc... that we can be if our children are not perfect, our homes are not cleaned and we do not handle the pressures of work well. I wish I had my husband's ability to believe that everything will work out and that stressing over it will only give me heartburn. Yes, I have the heartburn, but part of it is because he does not seem to be as concerned as I am about catching up. When I come home from teaching, I still have my wife and mother job to fullfill. My evenings and weekends are spent trying to get the house cleaned and the laundry done. Please understand that Andy does help out a lot, but my priorities are not his. He does not see all the incomplete projects around the house. He lives by the expression "Cleaning while the kids are growing is like shoveling while it is still snowing!" He cleans certain areas and does his laundry, but he does not worry about other parts of the house. I am the one who looks at everything and wants it to be put together perfectly, but I do not seem to have the time to get it all done.

Just so this posting does not look like I am upset with my husband, I do wish to clarify a little. Andy is great with the kids, helps out with many things that my father never helped out with or even fathers a generation ago would have helped out with. Andy will do the poopy diapers, help get MM dressed in the morning, put hair ties in MM's hair (something really funny to see), strip the dishwasher, clean his mancave and take care of all the snow removal (three and half feet this last time) so I do not have to. He is just laid back and I am jealous.

I wish I could win a contest in which I got a cleaning/ homerepair crew to come to my house and give me a clean slate to work with. I love watching Clean House on Style TV, but my house would not qualify. My house is messy, but not filthy with piles of stuff everywhere. It just can not be featured in Better Homes and Gardens, and I think that is what I secretly crave: to have a home that a magazine would want to feature it. So that is why I am Mrs. Grouchy.

Why I can't get to work on time

I have come to the conclusion that no matter what time I leave my house, I will not get to work on time. I must be in my classroom at 7:45 am each morning, but I have to take my daughter to daycare in the morning. I have the chance to take her to a daycare at my high school, so why can't I get to work on time? Well, my high school is so large it is in two different buildings. As luck would have it, the daycare is in the other building and I can only drop her off at 7:30 or later. Again, why can't I get to work on time? Well let me explain.

As any mother of a toddler will tell you, getting out of the house with your sanity intact is the first obstacle to overcome each morning. Somedays, MM is up at 6:30, dressed by 6:35 and sitting in front of the TV watch Ni Hoa Kia Lan on Nick Jr. Other days, I am lucky to get her dressed and ready to go by 7 am. For some reason she does not think she can put on her shoes until seconds before she leaves; she will even take them off if I put them on her too early. My smooth departure all depends on whether or not I have a happy child or a grouchy child. You would think she was a Gemini (like me) with the dueling personalities I have to deal with!

Once I leave the house, I need to go through three intersections that seem to be against me. The first intersection favors the opposing traffic so I have to wait to get my 10 seconds of a green light. If I am lucky, no one will be in front of me trying to turn left too, if there is, I might not make the light since there always seems to be a steam of opposing traffic. Next, I have an even longer light that favors the opposing traffic which is beside a school bus stop and an convenience store. Much of the traffic I encounter at this point wants to turn left, so once I get through it, I do not have much traffic in front of me until I go another 3/4 of a mile down the road where there is a t-intersection. I have the right of way, but the cars at this intersection do not seem to understand what stop means. I can not tell you the number of times I have had a car pull out in front of me and then go 10 miles below the speed limit!

No sympathy yet? Let me give you more details. Once I get to the city limits, I have to go through a series of intersections in which everyone seems to forget the rules of the road. If I go straight, I get to a stop sign and then can go straight again to another stop sign and then pray that someone will let me into traffic. Or, I can turn left, go to another stop sign and pray that someone will let me into traffic. Or, at the city limit, I can turn right, cross a bridge, turn left to merge into traffic, cross another bridge and go passed those two intersections in which I have to hope someone will let me out. The last option sounds like a no brainer, right? Well, at the merge point, road officials have placed a stop sign even though the merging traffic has its own lane to pull into! So, you have guessed it, people stop and wait until the other lane of traffic goes by before pulling into the always clear "merging" lane! Our lane does not go away, so it is not really a merging lane, it starts at our stop sign. Now, I have made it into the city, but wait, I have to go to a t-intersection that has a traffic light. There are two, one way lanes going north into the city intersected by one lane. If you are turning right at this light, after stopping, you can turn right all the time because there is never cross traffic for those turning right. So, what happens at this light? Cars turning right sit at the light and wait until it turns green. I repeat, there is never traffic coming from the left (there are houses) so right turn on red is always safe! Did I mention the fact that at this intersection is a school bus stop?

Now, I must go passed an elementary school, a technical school, another elementary school, into the one high school building's back parking lot, then passed an elementary school,  a middle school and then finally my high school building. Did I mention the fact that there is only one way into the high school lot and one way out so all the traffic bottle necks there? Did I mention the number of teenagers with hoodies up, I-pods on, cell phones in hand, walking into traffic without looking, I have to dodge? Or the number of parents who randomly stop in the middle of the road to let their children out of the car and then attempt to make a u-turn (in the middle of the road!) I have to avoid?

Now add snow.